Exhibit 5.24

Brief Encounters With Che Guevara

This debut collection from Ben Fountain is everywhere. I had just finished reading the back cover--the second or third occasion in which I had read the back cover without making the leap of purchasing the book--when I walked into a clothing store which, for whatever reason, just happened to be selling the book on clearance. I picked it up for the plane ride back to Nebraska and while I certainly wasn't disappointed, I wasn't in love either.

Oddly, I read the entire collection save for the final story on the plane, and when I picked it up at home last week and read the final story it was like I was reading an entirely different book. That story, "Fantasy for Eleven Fingers," is a strange, journalistic tale of an eleven-fingered Pianist playing in pre-WWI Vienna and is easily my favorite story of the collection. It accomplishes one of my favorite tricks of good fiction: I was convinced it was a true story, going so far as to turn to the Internet just to verify it was apocryphal. It's a very good story, exactly the kind of thing you'd hate to teach because its big pleasure is in its telling and not its showing. I'm not sure if there is a single moment you could even call a 'scene' in the entire story, but it's so much better for it.

The prose here is accomplished but straightforward, written mostly in mid-length sentences full of meaning-heavy similes and thoughtful reflection. Fountain does it so well that it would be juvenile to say these are the type of stories that M.F.A. programs typically produce and then want to publish in their literary journals, but during the lesser stories I had a hard time thinking anything differently. What saves them is their engagement with the world--mostly South America and Haiti--because though we've read stories like these, we haven't read these stories.

As the title somewhat inadvertently suggests, most here are 'encounter' stories of an American meets the 3rd world variety. Despite some misgivings, I actually liked the non-encounter story--"Bouki and Cocaine"-- the best of the Latin America stories. The others seemed to expect shock when we learn of the hypocrisy of revolution or awe at the strangeness of a foreign culture, and maybe I'm too cynical or Fountain is too polite but I felt I understood what the stories were trying to tell me long before they finished telling me. It's not the sort of thing I would usually let bother me except that I felt these were very moral stories. Fountain obviously cares deeply for the places he's been and it's that wide, generous view of the world that separates the book from so many others.

Still, I couldn't help but feel like every time a story was about to do something really interesting--a woman's soldier husband returns from Haiti practicing Voodoo!--Fountain pulls back--she does nothing about it and learns a lesson about marriage. Only "Fingers" truly punches. The rest are like handshakes from someone whose name you are trying to remember. It usually ends up okay.

Exhibit 5.23

Did you know this is what brussels sprouts look like on the stalk? Um, yeah, I did too.

Exhibit 5.22

I love the idea that whenever the company that made my fortune cookie was thinking up Chinese words and phrases the English speaking public might need to know, they settled on a list of things like Thursday and cat and hello and DON'T!

I know it's not actually presented like that, but I'm going to just pretend it is anyway.

The Chinese: More and more of our citizens are purchasing automobiles.
Me: DON'T!

The Chinese: In 2047, we will gain complete political autonomy over Hong Kong.
Me: DON'T!

The Chinese: I'm thinking about getting a tattoo.
Me: DON'T!

The Chinese: Can I ask out your sister?
Me: DON'T! I mean, sure.

I can only hope tomorrow's fortune cookie will have an even better word. Maybe something like bludgeon or coma or spare me.

And mae yao hesitate to use my lucky numbers. I have a good feeling about 2.

Exhibit 5.21

The Yiddish Policemen's Union

I feel like I may have a hard time writing about this book. Not only did I read it weeks ago, I went into it with unreasonably high expectations which may have clouded my opinion of it slightly. That is not to say I didn't love it--I did--but I felt like I enjoyed it more for its prose and its noir than its statement. That isn't even a critique, it's just a reversal of expectation that's left me somewhat confused as to what place it occupies in Chabon's canon.

The premise, much discussed, is immediately compelling and from the first sentence Chabon instills his broken hero with the desperation and cynicism of his exiled race. The plot moves in Chandler-esque fits and starts punctuated with scenes of our detective isolated, drunk, and unsure of his life and his case. Those, the moments where you can smell the cigarettes, the moments where the premise becomes background rather than what is driving the plot, were my favorite. Let's call this the small plot (which is to say small in scope not importance).

There's so much that's memorable about the world Chabon has created that it almost hurts to say that I was happier when the book was just a murder mystery set in an alternate reality. It's an almost irresistible thing to imagine and it's flawless as a setting. As an actor in the plot, however, I found myself less convinced with how Chabon's Sitka leads to this murder leads to this conspiracy leads to this ending. Let's call this the big plot.

The big plot bothers me though it's hardly the sort of thing to ruin a novel. It bothers me not because it was any more implausible than anything else in the novel (okay, maybe slightly more) but because I think it takes the leap from an ahistorical but potential reality to something that depends fundamentally on counter-intuitive logic. It's one thing to casually mention that there was an extended war with Cuba sometime in the 60s or that Marilyn Monroe was first lady as these are really only dressing to the little plot. But when the big plot relies on motivations that seem counter to our understanding of the world, it feels a bit like a cheat.

The rules that govern the little plot seem appropriate for a world only slightly removed from our own. The rules that govern the big plot seem to suggest a more fundamental difference. It's certainly not an unbridgeable gap, but I'm not sure that it ever gets adequately covered here. Learning the true nature of the big plot, our hero reacts--as we must--incredulously yet he doesn't seemed shocked by the daunting levels of corruption and commitment needed to pull off such a scheme that, at least in any world related to our own, is undertaken with a very shaky motive.

I'd like to think that I'm just over thinking it--and I probably am--but I couldn't help but feel like a brilliant, touching story with an unbeatable premise came to a bad end. The little plot is a perfectly wrought murder mystery written in stunning prose. The big plot is at best an ending that reached a little too far and at worst a small political point scored at the expense of the novel's internal logic and continuity. It's probably a little both, but it was enough to leave me thinking about how much I disliked being pulled out of the world in the last 50 pages after having read through the previous 350 as if they contained some delicious secret.

Even so, it's still a fascinating book and deserving of its place on any year end list it finds itself on.

Last thought:
One of my favorite aspects of Chabon's work is how compelling he can make characters who aren't on the page. Like Grady Tripp's wife in Wonder Boys or Art's father in The Mysteries of Pittsburgh, the victim here is a great character though he is, of course, dead.

Exhibit 5.20

A few journals that have recently come out.

Handsome.
This is Handsome's first issue, and it's pretty much fantastic. A large magazine style format? Check. Old-timey art? Check. Two poems that take stock of buoyancy? Check mate.

Jeff Downey:
Shortfall pulls glitter from the ground
Sort of drawstringing
An entire encore buoyant in winter
Dead marine words but fleetingly
How has it I have never been to the ocean

Julie Doxsee:
Only nylon
buoys you

I'm telling you now, you'll want to make sure you get in on Handsome at the beginning.

Redactions.
This issue of Redactions contains an exceedingly well done tribute to W.S. Merwin. They even have a special font. Good stuff.


Redivider.
Despite the picture, this one isn't actually tiny. In fact, it's full of big ideas and big words. Some words from this new issue of Redivider:

Thirsts
Rawness
Overcooked
Flagellum
Appaloosa
Wheezing
Pussytoes

I have MUtDs in all of these journals, but I'm only dragging them down.

Exhibit 5.19

Saw No Country for Old Men last night and thoroughly enjoyed it. It's nice to see the Coen brothers return to the harder edge of Blood Simple or even Miller's Crossing. Oh, or The Man Who Wasn't There, a great movie that I always forget about as, like its protagonist, it's a very wispy feature.

After their last few movies relied at least partially on devices (DahKOtin accents, Southern accents, Clooney, etc.), No Country is a film completely without gimmick and even the color palette is a muted Texas dust and blue skies as opposed to something more flashy like O Brother's gold tones or Miller's Crossing's autumnal roads. Fast, straight-forward, and surprising, it's one of those movies I always hope to see when I go to the theater. Usually I'm seeing Enchanted. I mean, that's fine too.

Best film of the year? Probably, though I had a singular appreciation for Zodiac which, incidentally, hits a lot of the same notes of societal entropy expressed by one, unstoppable man. The big difference is that Zodiac's San Francisco becomes a mad house of fear and paranoia while in No Country the evil, if that's what it is, walks empty streets. It's an interesting contrast especially since Fincher's movie is so meticulous while the Coens' is murky and grim. I prefer the No Country for a lot of reasons--it's better, for one; every interior shot looked like someplace I'd been as a kid in Nebraska, for another--but I just think it's interesting that so many movies this year seem to be about shocking events serving as markers of moral decay in the face of modernity. I haven't seen all of these, but in addition to No Country and Zodiac there is The Assassination of Jesse James..., Gone Baby Gone, Into the Wild, Sweeney Todd, and Dan in Real Life. Well, maybe not that last one.

And, seriously, Josh Brolin. Who knew?

Exhibit 5.18

I should probably point out that Drake University's basketball team is 9-1 and starting to get articles like this written about them.

Exhibit 5.17

I'm taking a break from being a shameless, shameless shill to update you on some recent sports developments: (in reverse order of importance)


Royals sign Ron Mahay!

If I told you that the Royals signed a 36-year-old left-handed situational reliever, how much would you guess they had to pay? If you said $5 million dollars, you're off by a full $3 million.

I swear to god, the fact that Ron Mahay gets $8 million dollars over the next two years is going to make me teach my child how to throw a curveball before he learn how to ride a bike. The worst part is that this can only be considered a good, slightly below market deal for the Royals. In fact, I'm all for it.

But, jesus, Ron Mahay? I mean, really? Mahay? $8 million?

This is the best day for a Mahay since Steve caught that fish that one time. Good for all of them, I say.


Royals sign Jose Guillen

Actually, scratch that about teaching my future son--let's call him Brautigan--to throw a curve. I'm teaching little Brautigan how to order HGH over the Internet with a prescription from a shady dentist in Florida. Contract: 3 years, $36 million.


If Mandy Patinkin Was a Fantasy Football Team makes the finals.

It all comes down to this after a not particularly close match up against my archenemy. Now I'm playing the other conference's champ and need a big week to win it all. Let's take a look at the matchup: (his player first [and if you know nothing about fantasy, note that only the team's performance as a whole matters and not these particular matchups])

Team Name - Team Skeet Ulrich vs. If Mandy Patinkin Was a Fantasy Football Team. Advantage: If Mandy Patinkin Was a Fantasy Football Team. Still, strange we both named our teams after actors. I'm giving myself the advantage because I was first and my actor is better.

QB - Ben Roethlisberger vs. Sage Rosenfels. Advantage: Um, let's just say it's not Sage. Good god, I'm screwed. Ben has actually already played and had a great though not insurmountable performance. I'm playing Sage under the theory that the Colts will pull all of their starters in the second half (they have nothing left to play for). Oh, there's also the theory that Eli Manning is horrible (you hear that, Eli, it's over between us. For real this time. We tried to make it work.)

I know all I need is a respectable performance from Sage and he did fine for me last week, but I just can't feel good about this. This is where I lose.

RB - Fred Taylor vs. Wills McGahee. Advantage: Push. I actually prefer McGahee here slightly but Taylor has been great all month. Still, I don't really trust him and feel like he's do for a let down week as MJD steps up to carry more of the load. Oddly, my opponent originally had McGahee starting in this spot so we'd have the same guy going. If it were my call, I'd go McGahee because I think he's a better bet to score, but it's hard to sit a guy who rushed for 150 yards last week.

By the way, I may have just been making myself feel better right there. I stand by my hunch, but you should know the consensus says Taylor is probably a better play.

RB - Joseph Addai vs. Jamal Lewis. Advantage: Push. Again, I feel okay with this because I think Addai sits for awhile. Think about it, the Colts can't hurt or improve their playoff position. They have a young RB who isn't exactly a load carrier and has really slowed down since the middle of the season. They have backups they like and work in a lot anyway. Why would they play him at all? If I was the other team, I'd go with McGahee in this spot. I think Addai gets two series tops.

Still, I'm going with a push here because I don't want to jinx Lewis who has a fantastic matchup, is on a team playing for something, and is really hitting his stride. I can't believe I'm saying this about a convicted felon, but I'd trust Lewis with my fictional son Brautigan's life this week.

WR - Greg Jennings vs. Randy Moss. Advantage: Moss. Here's where my team starts to show it's strength. The other team has solid but streaky receivers. Jennings is good, but I'll take my chances with Mr. Moss.

WR - Steve Smith vs. Reggie Wayne. Advantage: Wayne. I'm pretty sure I'll take one half of Reggie Wayne catching passes from Peyton Manning over a full game of Steve Smith catching passes from Matt Moore (who, incidentally, I think I went to grade school with).

Here's a pretty good test for QBs: If you have a name like an Arena League player, you'll probably end up being an Arena League player. Marino, Elway, Farve, Romo, etc. all have great names. Matt Moore sounds like he should be MVP of the Sioux Falls Sidewinders.

WR - Reggie Williams vs. Santonio Holmes. Advantage: Holmes. Holmes has already played and scored a nice 18 points. I have a hard time seeing Williams matching that as he's only done it twice all season. He's a WR that needs to catch a TD to have any value. Here's hoping he doesn't.

TE - Vernon Davis vs. Antonio Gates. Advantage: Who knows? Gates would be the consensus pick as he's the best TE in the game, but he's been so flaky lately that it's hard to say which Gates is going to show up.

Vernon Davis on the other hand is possibly the greatest combination of size, speed, and flexibility since Bo Jackson. Except he's not very good at football. Seriously though, he looks great running in those Under Armour commercials.

K - Phil Dawson vs. Josh Brown. Advantage: Dawson. Not that it really matters.

Defense - New England (against, gulp, Miami) vs. Minnesota (against Washington). Advantage: New England. Both are great plays, honestly, but anytime you get a 14-0 team against a 1-13 team, you take that matchup if you can get it. Sigh. I want the Dolphins to win far more than I want to win this fantasy championship.


Dolphins hire Bill Parcells to head up football operations.

Let's ignore the fact that Bill Parcells leaves every job he takes. That he has the body type of Gloop and Gleep from The Herculoids. That he is 66 and has heart problems. That he's kind of a jerk.

The guy wins. Good hire.

Exhibit 5.16

My Untimely Death by Adam Peterson is now available from Subito Press.

My little book My Untimely Death is now out. You can order it by sending $10 to:

Subito Press
Department of English
University of Colorado at Boulder
Hellems 101
226 UCB
Boulder, CO 80309-0226

I assume you should include a note asking for my book specifically though I imagine you'd be thrilled with any of them. You can also check out their website here though be warned: it's absurdly cool yet nearly impossible to navigate your first time. Using it is literally harder than learning to fly which, incidentally, you'll need to know how to do in order to use it.

The book is perfect bound, 56 pages, and has an ISBN number of 0-9801098-1-7. The folks at Subito did an amazing job, and I couldn't be happier with how it turned out. Please support them by picking one up and then let me know what you think of it. I'll have some pictures and maybe a short excerpt or two up later.

Oh, and don't tell my Grandma about this yet. I mean, if you see her.

Exhibit 5.15

DOLPHINS WIN! DOLPHINS WIN!

Exhibit 5.14

I don't even know how long I've been in California anymore. After Disneyland yesterday, the only things I know are the lyrics to "it's a small world" and the rapidly inflating price of a churro.

Ride Grades

Indiana Jones: A
Space Mountain: C+
Matterhorn: Broken Rib
Thunder Mountain: B
Pirates of the Caribbean: 3 Johnny Depps
Tower of Terror: A+
My Body Mass Index according to lamest ride ever: 29
29 BMI = Dangerously overweight
Dangerously Overweight: No
Cotton Candy: Delicious
Splash Mountain: B
Number of Inside Jokes: One One
it's a small world: it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all,

Exhibit 5.13

California Day Three-Four

In 'N Out Burger double double driving

Driving Takashi Murakami MOCA



Inochi, you are alive!



Dali at the LACMA

Ants ants ants film with ants

Dali's three American Surrealists: Harpo Marx, Walt Disney, and Cecil B. DeMille

Destino



Brunch driving card games

Fewer nickels

Exhibit 5.12

California Day Two

Sunshine dog walk harness sure to pick up

Pancakes

Sports bar Dolphins sad halftime goodbye

Rock Rose Gallery classical guitar clarinet tangos amazing super fun good time

Chimay Cuban pork industrial bar

Exhibit 5.11

California Day One

AM ice nearly in ditch late dog in bag

Tiny plane baby bagel package to head crying kicking singalong

Ontario lost coffee nap nap spectrum

Poke bowl asahi good choice

Golf beer stein thrill of victory

2 dollars and uncountable nickels richer

Exhibit 5.10

Fantasy football recap.

The Lincoln Hawks (7-6, fifth place)

Due to poor managerial skills, I've lost quite a few close games with this team and now need another team to lose (while I win) in order to back into the playoffs where I will be promptly crushed. I now understand why managers in all sports continue to run the same players out there over and over expecting a different result. Sooner or later, Steve Smith has to have a good game, right? Um, right?

Well, not right apparently. I think this season effectively answered the question of whether or not I should be put in charge of a major sports team. Given the opportunity, I would totally give Jason LaRue 150 at bats or leave Pedro Martinez in the game another inning or keep Ricky Thenarse on the bench or trade for AJ Feeley. I play favorites and hunches worse than anyone with my fantasy football team. That's probably why I have yet to accept Steve Smith as a disaster. I mean, he's Steve Smith.

Anyway, I've got a good feeling about him this week. Plus, I just don't like that Ronald Curry.

This week's quote from team namesake and Swift Transportation CEO Lincoln Hawk(s): "The world meets no one halfway."

If Mandy Patinkin Was a Fantasy Football Team (8-5, first place)

This team also went a little south since Randy Moss became human again, but it was still enough to capture first place heading into this week's opening playoff round. I feel okay about my chances right up until the moment I remember Eli Manning is prominently involved. Tom Coughlin, the entire NY Giants team, and his dad all feel the same way. I would actually like to get a drink with those guys just so we could all commiserate together. Then Eli would probably walk in and we'd all have to pretend that we were talking about Dancing with the Stars. Eli would probably take up that conversation enthusiastically and disappoint us all over again.

This is how you think when you rely on Eli Manning.

My team actually peaked already, but, as with Interpol and the first season of Heroes, I'm just pretending it didn't peak too early. Ideally Frank Gore wouldn't have played like a guy who's had major operations on both of his knees and I could have spun him for a quarterback, but it's too late for that now. My lineup going into this week:

QB - Eli Manning. I hate even typing it, but who else do I go with? Schaub is hurt and the best pick up option is Sage Rosenfels (who, and this is not a joke, dresses up like a clown and does children's birthday parties in the offseason. How can I feel okay with him?)

RB - Jamal Lewis. That nice playoff schedule is finally paying off.

RB - Willis McGahee. Gets the start over Gore but only because Gore has been absolutely awful. In fact, I think Gore is friends with Steve Smith.

WR - Randy Moss. The magic is still there, isn't it, Randy? I feel like a child pleading with his now alcoholic father to come back home and make things like they used to be. In fact, I'd say that's pretty much exactly the situation here. Remember how nice Halloween was, Randy? Christmas could be like that, be like it used to be, when things were good.

WR - Reggie Wayne. I honestly think this season might kill Reggie Wayne. Toward the end of last week's Colts game poor Reggie was limping downfield with four guys draped over him and still making catches. The Colts are not winning anything unless Marvin Harrison comes back.

WR - Patrick Crayton. Getting the start because I can't trust that Santonio Holmes will play. He was solid for me last week, and I like anyone who sticks with the full 'Patrick' and doesn't eventually breakdown and let everyone call him 'Pat.' That shows he's got guts. Thinking--and sincerely believing--things like this is how my managerial career would go south.

TE - Antonio Gates. Last week's 1 catch for -1 yard performance didn't happen. You hear me? Didn't happen. (On a more serious note, the QB I wanted to trade for earlier this year was Philip Rivers. Thank god both my friend Justin and I are idiots otherwise that might have happened. If both teams could redo that 2004 NFL draft again, would they bother trading those stiffs for each other or would they just say pass and sign Sage Rosenfels to be QB/Birthday Clown?)

(Take another look at the top of that 2004 draft by the way. It went bad, bad, great but moody, tragedy, finally blooming after some horrific seasons but moody, legitimately good and not a cancer, a cancer who got in a fight with coach, horrible, horrible. In other words, I feel lucky the Dolphins didn't end up with a guy who is now in prison.)

K - Josh Brown. He's a kicker and, as far as I know, not a clown in the offseason.

Def - Minnesota Vikings. I love that I was able to pick these guys up as free agents two weeks ago after going with some truly horrible defenses all year. They're good.

That's it. That is everything I know about fantasy football.

Exhibit 5.9

Earlier tonight a woman called my phone and left a breathless message saying she really needed Madison's costume. Unsure of what to do with this information, I got out some fabric and cardboard and sparkles and glue. I hope Madison likes turtles. Sparkly turtles.

Exhibit 5.8

Real football recap.

This season could not have gone any worse for my two "real" "teams" but thankfully my fantasy teams have been picking up the slack. I'm one more bad Dolphins loss away from starting to send messages to the Dolphins front office like, "Hey, maybe you should have traded for Randy Moss." I'll even write the messages on dollar bills from my fantasy football winnings to prove my point(s).

My point(s): They could have had Randy Moss for nothing/Some kid in Nebraska won a couple bucks playing fantasy football and he wants to spend his money tormenting the Dolphins

Miami Dolphins (0-12)
Here's my take on going winless over the season: Since about week six when people actually started talking about this, I've been of the opinion that a win was inevitable. This happens every year in one way or another, and the commentators and columnists work themselves up over a near impossibility until a team wins or loses or a record doesn't get broken and we all remember that it's a hard game won as often with luck as skill.

Take a look at this article. It's a few weeks old, but the gist is that the Dolphins are not only not the worst team of all-time but they aren't even the worst team in the league and sooner or later they'll win a game because they can't continue to be unlucky forever. Basically this guy justified with statistics what I'd believed and probably told you about if you were ever unfortunate enough to mention the Dolphins around me.

This doesn't make me feel better. I want to make that clear. I bring it up not to say the Dolphins aren't the worst team in the league--they are--but to illustrate that even though statistics, logic, and history all insist that the Dolphins will win one game this year, I'm no longer certain it will happen.

The similarity between a quest like the Patriots' quest to go undefeated and the Dolphins quest to go, well, defeated is that both are the kind of epochal events that deep down we want to see happen. Historically good and historically bad become markers of an era and barometers for the future and it's in everyone's interest to see these dramas played out as even if a team comes up short it can invigorate the game. There's no great conspiracy here, but it's no accident the Patriots got every call towards the end of last Monday's somewhat tainted win over the Ravens and that the Dolphins have lost twice as many games by 3 points or fewer (6) than the next closest team.

It's not about the refs for the Dolphins--though, in a few games, it sort-of was--it's about every other team wanting to avoid the ignominy of losing to an 0-12 team. It's a powerful motivator which tends to create what we usually call luck.

Team MVP: Old Chicago's Double Deckoroni pizza. They haven't won since I've started ordering this, but it is delicious.

Team LVP: Um...

Coach: Let's just say I no longer feel so great about the Cam "Cameron" Cameron reign. Now, I'm not saying they should fire the guy after only one season, but it now has to be in the discussion. I don't know if there is anything more emasculating to an NFL coach than to get fired as head coach and then come back as an assistant coach--we should ask Gunther Cunningham--but I'm now fully on board with trying to retain Cam as an offensive coordinator with a new head coach. I know that won't happen. I know a lot of things won't happen.

Nebraska Cornhuskers (season over)
There's a new coach with a great slogan so they've got that going for them. Bo Big Red should be interesting if nothing else. I hope after our next K-State victory he goes and punches Bill Snyder. I know Bill Snyder is no longer the coach, I just want him to do it anyway.

MVP: Marlon Lucky? I guess. Maybe I'm forgetting someone, but I honestly have no idea who to put here. It's not that Lucky, Keller, Purify, and Ganz didn't all have their moments, but no one really took over for this team. In other words, they went 5-7.

LVP: Let's just say I knowingly didn't put any defensive players on that list of performers.

Coach: The newspaper headlines write themselves here. Bo Big Red! Bo Knows Defense! Bo Bridges Crimson Tide! And, even if it doesn't work out, the Custer County Chief can run with the headline 'Broken Bo'.

I could do this all day.


Fantasy recap coming tomorrow.

Exhibit 5.7

My elbow is killing me after playing Wii Sports baseball over the weekend. I threw a no hitter against the computer and my Mii went 2-2 with a HR, double, and 2 RBIs. Of course, I now need Tommy John surgery, but it was worth it. As I told several disinterested parties, I would do it all again in order to beat my arch nemesis Akira.

No matter what anyone tells you, I definitely didn't create back stories for my players or make unbreakable judgments about the relative skills of each identical player.

Exhibit 5.6

T H E C L E A N P A R T

Cynthia Arrieu-King
Jason Bredle
Jen Tynes

6:30 tonight at Jones Coffee
(11 & G)

Note the time, venue, and font change.