Exhibit 1.5.7

Demographic Survey

Now I know which advertisers to approach.


Exhibit 1.5.6

Question Time

J. Stock asks, Author branding question here:If you were to add a stylistic third 'middle name', what would it be?

I'm going to answer this here because A) I'm really only writing this blog for J. Stock at this point and B) It's a good question.

When I first started writing I thought I needed a cooler name, both because Adam Peterson is common enough another writer might share it and because, I don't know, cooler names are cooler (I could name authors I think are twice as popular as they would otherwise be because of good names but I won't).

Still, I'll admit I never thought about Cougar-ing up my name. If anything, I considered going with A. William Peterson because...I don't know. I'm an idiot?

Middle name options:

1) Dagger - My go-to fake cool guy name.

2) Stone - Because my friend Justin always named his RPG characters this and I thought it was cool and Justin doesn't write so screw Justin.

3) Adam - People would be like, "Have you read Adam Adam Peterson's new tiny book?" And other people would be like, "No."

4) Sarah - People would be like, "Is that a man or a woman?" And other people would be like, "We don't know and we're his parents."

5) Pepsi - I could either go uber-hipster or uber-sell out with it.

6) Night - No way that could go wrong.

7) Toni Morrison - Just because it would be confusing and everyone would ask if we were related although probably not.

8) Adrian - Same.

9) Pope - Because it could easily transition into a fallback career.

10) Wladimir - I've always loved those crazy half-Russian names that Cubans sometimes have. I want one. Now. I'll swim there.


Exhibit 1.5.5

I Only Write to Say I Love Me

Sorry for more self promotion but I'm really excited about this:

I present to you [SPOILER ALERT] out now from Dzanc Books. Done with the brilliant Laura Eve Engel, it's 36 collaborative prose pieces the likes of which you can check out at DIAGRAM here and Sixth Finch here.

And read an interview we did about it here.

And order it here already.

Much thanks to Matt Bell, Dan Wickett, Steve Seighman, and everyone else at Dzanc.


Exhibit 1.5.4

Me Trying to Get a Driver's License: A Play

[Scene: a hellscape of over 100 screaming people with chairs pointed every direction, a kind of adult kindergarten after the teacher has left the room with an intercom slowly announcing numbers well into the thousands like that radio tower on LOST, a place I drove 30 minutes to and waited another 20 in line at]

Me: Here's my old license and a passport.
Lady: I need your Social Security card, too.
Me: That's not what it said on the website. It said I needed it or a passport.
Lady: It changed. Now you need both.
Me: You're honestly telling me everyone in Texas with a driver's license has a passport?
Lady: What?
Me: Well, I don't have my social security card.
Lady: You can also use a college transcript.
Me: What?

[Interruption from an old white woman who asks for a book to study for the written exam and is told they only have them in Spanish. She putters away presumably vowing to vote Republican until she dies next month].

Lady: So can I help you with anything else?
Me: Did you help me with anything this time?

The worst part is: she was totally right and I either misread something or it has changed. And now here I am complaining about being incorrect on the internet because I know I have to go back there tomorrow. I guess with a college transcript and some apology roses.