Exhibit 1.2.27

Look

I'm sorry. I haven't been feeling well. To make it up to you, here's a Blossom Possum:



Other things:

* I successfully identified the female lead from King Ralph within 5 seconds of seeing her in something filmed 15 years later. This, quite possibly, is the proudest moment of my life.

* I think people should talk more about how weird it is that Peter O'Toole, John Hurt, and Richard Griffiths are in King Ralph. Even 20 years later, I keep expecting the British to burn D.C. to the ground for this.

* It's like if the French made a movie called The Godpère about an effete French puppeteer who becomes the leader of the Mafia much to the chagrin of his lieutenants played by Al Pacino and Robert De Niro.

* By the way, what are the odds that all of those actors (and John Goodman) would still be alive today? We may not have numbers that high.

* To this day I assume that the British monarchy is such that you can just give the crown to a really good servant if need be, sort of like passing on an out-of-style suit.

* Yeah, so maybe I've just been watching King Ralph for the past week.

Exhibit 1.1.4

Seminar Papers

So I'm writing about King Lear which means I'm writing what somebody else said about King Lear a long time ago, but I haven't read them so my essay still counts.

What I can contribute to Lear scholarship is an awesome title. I think people should pay me to do this:

King Leer: Cordelia Behind the Mask-uline Gaze

Behind the (Corn)Wall: Regan's Feminist Plight

Kent and Kant: Perversions of Loyalty and the Refusal to Say "I Ken't"

Won't Be Fool-ed Again: Who's Next after the Fool's Death

No, No, Know Life! Lear's Death As Self-Recovery

Cordelia's Acquiescence to Love and [Sigh]lence

"Tom's a (C/B)old:" Edgar's Movement from Passionless to Passionate

I Hold You As an Other: Bastardy and Fraternal Relations

Pluck Out His I's: Denial of Soliloquy and the Blind Subjectivity

Exhibit 17.5

Today's the day where I post Urge Overkill's "Dropout" without explanation or commentary.

Your reaction should be as follows:

If my brother: Excitement/regret that I didn't also post "Start Choppin'"

If anyone else: Doubt/regret that you sometimes have to talk to me



Okay, so maybe a little commentary: what was 1993's best album? Either of those two? Siamese Dream? In Utero? Pablo Honey? I probably would have said one of those at the time, but I was 10, so I only knew what was on MTV.

Okay, some quick searching leads me to Bjork's Debut, Exile in Guyville, and Transmissions from the Satellite Heart. I'd also throw Anodyne in there though I don't think that was anyone's favorite Uncle Tupelo album at the time.

Ah, Enter the Wu-Tang, Doggystyle, and that Digable Planets album also came out. Predator came out in late 1992.

I don't even have any of these records anymore. I was shocked when "Dropout" popped up on my iPod. Apparently I once got it off Napster and have been moving it from computer to computer ever since. It was long ago retitled KNSLKO. I like it better that way.

Exhibit 11.13

A Map of the Neighborhood


That's right, my neighborhood features a booming for-profit plasma donation industry.

There's also a fairly impressive hole where there used to be a park and a junk store. Now the junk store is gone (presumably it fell in the hole) and the house next to it is gleefully celebrating being the last house on the street by playing loud music. They seem unconcerned about the all-consuming hole encroaching upon them, but it's really hard to see how this is going to work out well.

There are other landmarks I didn't get a chance to add like the-house-where-the-sex-offender-lived-until-his-proximity-to-an-elementary-school-forced-him-to-move and the-gas-station-where-the-guy-who-knew-that-and-told-us-somewhat-randomly-works.

Exhibit 10.1

It's official, Clock King is the worst "super" villain imaginable:

"The Clock King has no metahuman powers or abilities, although he is athletic and extraordinarily punctual."

Oh, well, okay then. By that reasoning, my dad should be Green Lantern's mortal enemy.

Clock King is an awful super villain but a great hourly employee. Why are those qualities always mutually exclusive?