Exhibit 23.12

Beard


Thankfully the mini-blizzard that has kept me in the house has allowed me to grow out my beard without confronting the humiliation of other people. And thank god, otherwise I wouldn't have realized that it's not that I'm incapable of growing proper facial hair, it's that I'm a musketeer.

Seriously, I'm shaving Wednesday.

Exhibit 11.11

I've officially done this blog for an entire year now. When I started, I told myself I'd do it for a year and see how it went. As it would be a shame to disappoint the two people who read this nonsense, I'm going to keep going indefinitely.

There have been so many memories. Remember that time I did that thing with the Robert Creeley poem? Or posted a picture of Brett? Or railed against The Magician's Assistant? Yep, it's been one crazy year.

It's tough to say what my favorite post is, but it's hard to beat this one, frankly.

Exhibit 10.5

So, apparently My Untimely Death is now at Amazon.com. You can pick it up right here. As this is greatly preferable to having to mail a check, I hope they'll be getting more than the one copy they currently have.

Did I mention they only have one copy at the moment?

I still think it's cool.

Exhibit 9.27

In case you doubted the power of One Song Sunday, the Journal Star has you covered:

Lincolnites try to make 13-hour song

The best part is going to be when tomorrow they publish an article headlined:

Lincolnites make 13-hour song

It's been a slow news decade here in the Star City.

What we saw of the performance (approx hours 8-11) was really fascinating and worked thanks to the random performances from the people mentioned in the article. I did my part by softly hitting a bongo, just once, until Carlin took over and actually music-ed with it. I'm no hero.

Exhibit 4.17

Countdown to GRE Literature Subject Test.

Days left until test: 1
Things I still don't know: 1300-1590, 1620-1840, poetry, math
Things I do know: Faulkner and maybe a little Woolf
Things you know: If read this blog, probably more than you wanted to about dogs and Jon Bruning
Obscure work I spent too much time on: Definitely Love's Last Shift, or, Virtue Rewarded
What I'm going to do after the test: Bask in the buzzing hug of television
Swears upcoming in this post: 1
Dolphins wins: 0
Replies to the Passionate Shepherd: Ubiquitous

Relevant but rambling story: In high school I had an AP History teacher whose sole reason for living seemed to be to get his kids to pass the AP American History exam. All semester long he paced up and down the rows of desk as we took practice exams and mumbled to the smart kids, "You're going to do some real damage on this test, some real damage." He taught us obscure facts at the expense of the important because the easy stuff wouldn't be on the test (he claimed). Anyway, so we took the test. It went fine and we were well prepared, but when we went to class on Monday and told him the most obscure question on the test, his face fell and all he could do was shake his head. The question was about a pioneering TV show, the answer was All in the Family. All in the Family? he asked again and again until his heart finally broke with the knowledge that he was going to have to introduce television shows into his curriculum. It was too much. He quit teaching the AP class he'd been teaching for over 20 years after that semester.

Anyway, he only had 1607-1975 to deal with. We've got Homer to Toni Morrison. I hope every single fucking question is about Meathead.